Bill Hicks joke
Based on not one, but several actual conversations I’ve had over the years.
Transcript GIRL MONKEY | Ooh, little chilly tonight! I can see my breath! |
MONKEY ANGST | You know what I like best about cold weather? |
MONKEY ANGST | Watching all the smokers passing out 'cause they don't know when to stop exhaling! |
GIRL MONKEY | Hey! That's a Bill Hicks joke! You stole that joke! |
MONKEY ANGST | Stole? what stole? it was a quote! I was quoting Bill Hicks! |
GIRL MONKEY | Quoting my ass. you didn't attribute it. there was no attribution. |
MONKEY ANGST | Attribution? what is this, a peer-reviewed journal? this is a casual conversation! |
MONKEY ANGST | Since when do you have to attribute quotes in casual conversation? |
GIRL MONKEY | You were just trying to pass it off as your own! |
MONKEY ANGST | I was not! |
GIRL MONKEY | Yes you were. You were hoping I wouldn't recognize it! |
MONKEY ANGST | Listen, I would never in a million years think you wouldn't know Bill Hicks. |
MONKEY ANGST | The fact is, you're cooler than me in every way, and I knew I could rely on that fact. I knew you'd know where the joke came from, so I didn't think it needed any attribution! |
GIRL MONKEY | Heh. |
GIRL MONKEY | Nice try. |
MONKEY ANGST (thinking) | Man, I wish I'd thought up that joke... |